Father By Choice By Amanda Berry

Thursday, May 02, 2013

A Million Reasons
by Amanda Berry


In trying to write this blog post, I have found a million other things that need to be done. Not necessarily first, but far easier than coming up with a blog topic. The puppy needed to go outside. The kids needed stuff. (Kids always need stuff) Oh, had to watch the latest episode of Castle. Clothes needed to be cleaned. I had to pack for the RT Convention in Kansas City. My guest bedroom bed needed to be made. Had to watch the latest episode of Bones. Need to go to the store for a new coffee maker and medicine for the sick kid. The list goes on and on.


When Maggie Brown first tells Brady about his daughter in my book Father by Choice, Brady is so busy with work that he almost misses out on the chance to meet his seven-year-old daughter. Even when he comes to his senses and flies home for the first time in eight years, he's too wrapped up in work to realize what he's missing. Granted a blog post isn't as big of a deal as meeting your daughter for the first time, but I'm beginning to see where that part of Brady's personality came from. Or maybe it comes from my wish to be less easily distracted.

So here I am on a plane, finally ready to write my blog post. Realizing that procrastination would be the topic and that it would tie into my story makes me want to go back a couple days ago and smack myself and shout "Really?" But time travel has not been invented or I wouldn't be writing this on a plane. Even when we know better, it's still easier to procrastinate, then to sit down and do what needs to be done. Part of it is fear. Take Brady. He's running away and burying himself in work so that he doesn't get hurt. He lost his father and later lost his mother when he was a teenager. He needed to be as far away from his brothers as possible. When confronted with someone who might love him and who he might love too, it scares him. Loving someone equals pain when you lose them. He has to choose whether he's willing to risk the pain to enjoy the present.

For me, it's not quite as deep or profound as Brady, but it still matters. If I had sat down and finished this blog post a few days ago, I wouldn't be worried about how I'm going to get it done in time. I would have enjoyed the stuff I did instead more because I wouldn't have been worried about getting this done. And maybe, just maybe, I would have slept better than I have the past few nights.

Procrastination is a distraction that is way easier than getting work done and there is the opposite side of the coin where work keeps you from enjoying what life truly has to offer. I guess what it really comes down to is balance. The realization that sometimes it's okay to slack off and have fun, but only when the work is done or progress has been made. I know balance is something I struggle with because I work at home. There will always be a million other things pressing on my mind or needing my attention, but work is important too. It's easy to get sidetracked when the house is messy or the kids are sick or the puppy is sleeping (she's so cute when she sleeps on me and I hate to wake a sleeping puppy). When I worked in an office, work had my full attention. People would be waiting for me to do things for them. I could take a vacation and not bring work with me and I definitely couldn't bring the puppy to work. :)

How do you find balance between all the things that need to be done? I'm still working on finding it for myself. I hope that Brady has found it. If you want to see for yourself if Brady found a good balance, check out my May release, Father by Choice, or comment to win a signed copy for free. :)